Erotica Readers & Writers Association Blog

Friday, August 30, 2013

Sex, Chaos and Story

Happy Birthday to me! Well ERWA birthday at least! As of today I’ve been writing for ERWA for a whole year. Where has the time gone? So much has happened in a year, and yet it seems like only yesterday I wrote my first post about inspiration and mythology. Traditionally birthdays are a time to celebrate, let your hair down, wreak a little havoc and raise a little hell. Oh wait a minute … That’s writing I’m talking about, not birthdays. Writing, plot, story -- there’s no place better to raise a little hell, and we writers know it’s the perfect place to let our hair down vicariously.

In my opinion, there are few things a writer can do to a story that will kick-start it quite as much as creating a little chaos. A calm and happy life in the real world might be just the ticket, but in story, there’s one word for it – BORING! A story is all about upsetting the apple cart, breaking the eggs, turning the bull loose in the china cupboard and -- heart racing, palms sweating – seeing what happens, while we’re safely ensconced on the other side of the keyboard/Kindle/book.  Oh yes we do love that adrenaline rush -- at someone else’s expense!

One of the best tools for dropping the character smack-dab into the middle of the chaos  – and the reader vicariously – is sex. And the more inconvenient, the more inappropriate, the more confusing, the more SO not what the character was expecting, the more delicious the chaos will be.

The thing about those big brains that I spoke of a few posts back is that they like to make us think we can control all the variables. The thing about the biological housing for those big brains is that it doesn’t always want to be controlled. Oh and that big brain, well that means there’s all sorts of stuff going on up there that can lead us down the havoc-wreaking road to sex and chaos. It wants what it wants. And the ole grey matter can be so damned stubborn at times. Oooh! I get goose bumps just thinking about what happens when the big brain gets a hankering and the biological soup starts overheating and sex happens.

If we look at Western history from the point of view of religion and its effects on culture, there are few things the religious powers that be have made more of an effort to control than sex. And in story, in myth, there are few things that have caused more chaos than a little rough and tumble in the wrong place at the wrong time. Troy lost war and was destroyed over it, King Arthur’s realm fell because of it, David had Bathsheba’s husband, Uriah, killed because of it.

The resulting chaos that sex unleashes in a story can be nothing more than to create self-doubt in a cock-sure character, which is always a delight to see. Or the resulting chaos can be world-destroying, and anything in between. Sex can cause the kind of chaos that will make the reader laugh, or the kind of chaos that will make the reader say, ‘if only they hadn’t done that.’  However, the one thing sex should never do in a story is leave things the way they were before it happened. Can it be used for bonding? Of course! But the tighter the bond, the more chaos can be caused if that bond is tested or broken. I shiver with delight at the thought.

And because our big brains don’t give a damn if our sexual thoughts and fantasies are ‘socially acceptable,’ nor is it discriminating about who we might have those thoughts and fantasies about, the resulting internal chaos can be almost as delicious as the external – maybe even more so. That lovely mix of guilt and desire and self-loathing and arousal and denial and shear over-heated lust. OMG! It’s a total writer’s paradise there for the taking.

I’m sure I’m like most writers in that I analyse what I read for pleasure in terms of what worked and what didn’t, what I would have done if I’d written it, and what I’ve learned from the author’s writing skills that can be used to make my own writing better. I have to say one of the biggies for me is how well the author uses chaos to move the story forward at a good pace; and especially how effectively sex is used to create chaos.  I’m sure I pay a lot more attention to how sex is used in a story (or not) now that I write erotica, but it’s the resulting chaos that fascinates me and keeps me reading in almost any kind of novel. The world is not a static place, and especially the world of story should not be static. Happy endings are called happy endings because they are at the end. They follow the chaos and happen when the story is finished. There is no more story, or at least none the reader wants to follow. It’s the chaos that pulls us in and keeps us turning the pages, and when that chaos is directly tied to sex, hold on to your hat!


  1. Thanks for reading it, Murat.

    And thanks Kay, for the comment. One of my favourite topics.

  2. This is a major insight - thank you! As I read this post, I thought, "Yes, yes, and yes!" Many erotica authors do this instinctively, but it's so useful to have it articulated this way.

    I'm off to remind the folks on writers to read this!

    1. Thanks Lisabet! I always find it works for me, especially when no matter how rude and kinky the sex is, erotica writers are no less story tellers than other writers, it's just that we're quite happy to use all our tools ... pun possibly intended ;-)

  3. We're also thumbing our noses at those who prefer conventional morality, and who think that they can control chaos with strict enough rules. Thing is, the stricter the rules, the wilder the misbehavior when someone thinks they can get away with it, right?

    Yes, real life can be quite dull. Thinking up characters with more interesting lives helps to alleviate the soul-crushing boredom of tedious bread-money jobs. That's why when given the choice, I prefer to work alone...with my thoughts...that are never about work!

  4. That was another issue I could have raised in way more detail, Fiona, the fact that our Western 'Christian' culture has always had tight controls on sexuality. And, as you say, the tighter the controls, the wilder the misbehaviour.

    Living the structured lives we do, it's no wonder that escapism, and for those of us who write, it's never very far away, is so important.

    Thanks for the comment.


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