tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7396437919069310850.post1555064964611607006..comments2023-05-30T08:29:42.770-04:00Comments on The Erotica Readers & Writers Association Blog: The Martyrs of ErosCroco Designshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04417265522875605547noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7396437919069310850.post-72364122837708218992015-03-17T19:34:54.069-04:002015-03-17T19:34:54.069-04:00gosh is that why line hasn't been working for ...gosh is that why line hasn't been working for me. . .<br /><br />Garceushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11160407485298015371noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7396437919069310850.post-63694883510907865902015-03-17T11:52:41.639-04:002015-03-17T11:52:41.639-04:00Excellent point about the risk of expressing desir...Excellent point about the risk of expressing desire--that is so true, and certainly falls more upon the man. It occurs to me now that the romance genre is about exploring a man's emotional risks and willingness to commit emotionally (the emotional virgin gaining experience). Again, not sure what is cultural or "evolutionary biology" but it is so not a turn-on when a man says, "I just love ALL women and you're looking pretty today." Donnahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13615190390845433428noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7396437919069310850.post-75029226726050349182015-03-16T17:33:31.404-04:002015-03-16T17:33:31.404-04:00Hi Donna!
The baby boomers came along at a good t...Hi Donna!<br /><br />The baby boomers came along at a good time. But I also have a sense of things being rolled back to cater to a conservative minority. At the same time gay rights are being pushed forward. This is such a powerful time to be alive, i think that is why people become afraid and become reactionary. Things change so fast and power becomes concentrated so easily in the hands of a few, and the few are always men.<br /><br />I've taken note of what you've said here about omen being turned on by the man's desire. I also think that's interesting to sense or look for or be excited by his willingness to explore things or do things he wouldn't do, to take those emotional risks. That has to be the soul of romancce writing in a nutshell. The risk of taking a chance o something new. I don;t think its social though, I think it probably is at least part instinctive and physical. Evolutionary to want to be desired and the man wanting to assert his desire but only if its welcomed. Men fear rejection. Expressing desire is itself a risk.<br /><br />GarceGarceushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11160407485298015371noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7396437919069310850.post-49605703285851095212015-03-16T17:26:14.358-04:002015-03-16T17:26:14.358-04:00Clearly for a man it isn't, and you would be t...Clearly for a man it isn't, and you would be the one to know as far as what women are thinking or not when they're turned on. But you have to admit - it takes a lot of guts to be a woman. I think the world would have been a kinder place over all if human beings had stuck to their original worship of a female god rather than a male god.<br /><br />Garce<br />Garceushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11160407485298015371noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7396437919069310850.post-89892443978914034612015-03-16T15:01:35.603-04:002015-03-16T15:01:35.603-04:00I'm going to print this post out for reference...I'm going to print this post out for reference, too! I haven't found all that many male-authored descriptions of male sexual pleasure that show such self-awareness and joy in the experience.<br /><br />I second Lisabet's point that the Baby Boomers did not experience the same fear of pregnancy and total disgrace. Unfortunately reproductive rights have been rolled back and HIV, herpes and other STI's have brought caution back to a degree.<br /><br />I hesitate to speak for all woman. My breasts have never gotten in the way of my view of anything but perhaps they do for more voluptuous women? One thing I'd hazard is that for me and many women I know, the man's desire is a real turn-on. His attention, his willingness to do things we suspect he wouldn't otherwise do (watch the cunnilingus scene in <i>Outlander</i>?), his delight in touching us, and yes, that erection which gives it all away. I mention this because for me it would be a total turn-off to force myself on a partner who didn't desire me. Not that my desire isn't a critical part of this, just that we're socialized to feel important when men want us. Or maybe it's instinctive and physical, too. That's just one of many ways to answer!Donnahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13615190390845433428noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7396437919069310850.post-56894053567812832992015-03-15T23:13:29.419-04:002015-03-15T23:13:29.419-04:00You're certainly right about my experience hav...You're certainly right about my experience having been one of privilege. Every day I read horror stories about the way women are treated in India, in Afghanistan, and yes, even in the US. <br /><br />And childbirth is still dangerous. (Did you know that the US infant mortality rate is higher than many developing countries? Appalling.)<br /><br />I still question whether the dangers of sex are ever foremost in one's mind when one is in the throes of arousal, though.Lisabet Saraihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05162514190572269660noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7396437919069310850.post-19160223446598810622015-03-15T08:22:25.706-04:002015-03-15T08:22:25.706-04:00Hi Lisabet!
Ah - but we are the children of prive...Hi Lisabet!<br /><br />Ah - but we are the children of privelege, born in the right time and place. We live in the time when The Pill was invented and pushed through by strong women against the stupidity of powerful men who resisted giving women control of their bodies. The religious taboos are still there and in many countries, maybe yours too, women still take their life in their hands to bring life into this world. Not to mention the horrors of rape and other things women go through.<br /><br />This is the best time in human history to be a woman, you;re right about that. But women have always been and still are the martyrs of eros.<br /><br />GarceGarceushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11160407485298015371noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7396437919069310850.post-27277919370498549602015-03-15T07:56:31.612-04:002015-03-15T07:56:31.612-04:00I want to print this out and keep it as a referenc...I want to print this out and keep it as a reference, for the next time I'm trying to write a male character. You do such a wonderful job of description, so many details, but not just the physical ones but the emotional correlates as well.<br /><br />I will tell you though, that for my generation, death or pregnancy was never a concern. I lived in the golden time after the Pill but before AIDS. And honestly, I suspect that most women don't think about these issues when they're aroused. Perhaps the life-and-death possibilities should influence our sexuality, but generally they don't. In that sense, women are just like men.<br /><br />Great post, Garce!<br />Lisabet Saraihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05162514190572269660noreply@blogger.com